5 Hot Stories: Golden Bachelorette Joan Tells All, 'OTH' Feud Update

Joan Vassos. John Chapple / JohnChapple.com / MEGA

exclusively opened up to Us Weekly about her experience as the first-ever Golden Bachelorette — and revealed she made a few of her own rules on her way to finding The One. “I went through some really, really, really tough emotional times that made me think ‘I’m not sure if I can do this,’” Joan, 61, told Us of the final weeks of her journey, noting that by the end, she felt “healed,” “confident” and “hopeful” about her future. Throughout the heartfelt season, which premiered last month, Joan has spoken openly about her late husband, . “People kept saying, ‘Are you 100 percent ready for this journey?’ And I kept saying yes,” she told Us. “Then, as I started developing feelings for some of the men, all of a sudden I had this, like, ‘Oh, my God, what am I doing?’” Scroll down for more of today’s top stories:

discussed her rumored drama with former One Tree Hill costar , insisting on the “Call Her Daddy” podcast that she doesn’t “have any problem with her.” filed for divorce from husband in September, but a source tells Us he hopes their marriage can be reconciled. “He doesn’t want the family to be divided, and [would love] to put this behind them,” the insider says. Finnish hockey player ’s ex-boyfriend has reportedly confessed to his murder after the late athlete was found dead in his home at age 29. revealed at a recent mental health summit that she no longer sleeps in her own bedroom because she associates the space with “such a really dark time” in her life.

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Follow UsjQuery( document ).ready( function( $ ) { let randomNumber = Math.floor( Math.random() * 100 ), is_spanish = false, is_featured_post = false; if ( randomNumber < 96 && $( '#news-block .shop-with-us__container' ).length ) { $( '#news-block .shop-with-us__container' ).show(); $( '#news-block .news-widget, #news-block .newsletter-form' ).remove(); } else { if( $( '#news-block .shop-with-us__container' ).length ) { $( '#news-block .shop-with-us__container' ).remove(); } if ( is_spanish ) { // 99% should be newsletter signup if ( randomNumber < 99 ) { $( '#news-block .news-widget' ).remove(); } else { $( '#news-block .newsletter-form' ).remove(); $( '#news-block .news-widget' ).show(); } } else if ( is_featured_post ) { // no newsletter block $( '#news-block .newsletter-form' ).remove(); $( '#news-block .news-widget' ).show(); } else { // 50/50 if( 0 === parseInt( $.now() ) % 2 ) { $( '#news-block .news-widget' ).remove(); } else { $( '#news-block .newsletter-form' ).remove(); $( '#news-block .news-widget' ).show(); } } if ( navigator.userAgent.match( /(iPod|iPhone|iPad)/ ) ) { $( '#news-block .news-widget .google-news' ).remove(); } else { $( '#news-block .news-widget .apple-news' ).remove(); } } } ); In this articleBethany Joy LenzHilarie BurtonJoan Vassos